A year ago today...

Marriage has exceeded my every expectation. Sure it's hard work at times, but so is anything of value that we attempt. It has been such a rewarding experience.

A big thank you to everyone who made it so special - for helping out, or just by being there.

To my mom, who has been a mom and a dad my whole life...a cooler mom does not exist! Everything I am, become or have is because of you. I hope and pray that I can be exactly the type of person and mother that you are.

To my Guru Maharaja, Bhakti Caitanya Swami, who gave me away and took part in the ceremony as my father, words cannot express my gratitude, love and appreciation. I am eternally grateful to be the disciple of such a wonderful, caring and compassionate spiritual master.

To Indradyumna Swami, who played a part in bringing us together, so many years ago with a garland :) At a wedding, you wrapped a garland around the couple's hands and bathed it with milk. You then said that the girl who caught this garland was guaranteed to marry a handsome, loving, wonderful, Krsna-conscious devotee. Thank you for throwing that garland to me :) I think it was a case of 'From your lips to Gods ears', because here I am married to that handsome, loving, wonderful devotee you promised - a devotee who inpsires me in my Krsna consciousness and pushes me to be a better devotee.

And finally to Bhaktimarga Swami, who supported and guided us from the very beginning. At our wedding you joked that you were 'concerned' that Savyasacin wouldn't find someone he wanted to be with and marry...I'm glad that you no longer have a need to be concerned :) You were hoping that things would work out between us from the first time we met before we even knew we wanted to be together! Your support and encouragement has been a lifeline in our marriage and in our spiritual lives.

And of course, a big thank You to Krsna...without Him, none of this would be a reality. I pray that we can both make You the absolute center of our lives, and that together we can make a difference in spreading Krsna consciousness.

My grandfather...Deepcharan Mathura

On February 21, nearly two weeks ago, on the most auspicious appearance day of Narottama das Thakur, my beloved gradfather left his body, and passed away.
I had left Canada on Sunday the 17th February, and arrived in Durban on Tuesday, the 19th. Two days later, my grandfather passed away.

I'm so grateful that Krsna allowed me to spend two days with you. Its only because of you that our family took to Krsna consciousness...you never enforced it upon us, but let everyone take their time to accept Lord Caitanya and Krsna into our lives.
I never thought that there would be a time when you wouldn't be around - which is an unrealistic, childish notion. I also thought that, having knowledge of the philosophy, death would be easier to handle. Its actually the most difficult thing in the world. Sometimes I'm just glad that you had such a peaceful, Krsna conscious death, and at other times, I feel like my heart is being squeezed with the pain that your loss has brought.
I don't know where you are right now - that's between you and your Lord; but I take comfort in Gurudeva's words, that you are 'in the best hands' now.

Our wedding will not be same without you; neither will our lives for that matter. But I thank you for the precious gifts you have given us, given me specifically - thank you for being so steady and Krsna conscious before you left; for being so peaceful and accepting. I'm sorry that you suffered in those days leading up to your passing, but you were such a wonderful example for us all. The most important thing you taught us was with your attitude in those last few days.

Please know that you will always be loved and missed...and that you have done the greatest service by bringing us all to the lotus feet of Krsna, and assissting us in our spiritual lives.